Brain Soundtrack

Once or twice a month, I will wake up in the morning with a random song playing in my head like a recording. They don't seem to hold any relevance to any part of my life, except my brain recorded it perfectly and played it back to me that morning. It sounds pretty loud in my head too.

About six months ago, I had the idea to write down each song that I woke up to. Here's my list, the second half of this year, in review.

June: Gloria Esteban - Christmas in Your Eyes.
I actually heard this song last week in the Goodwill, but it's xmas season now, so it makes sense.

July: Sharp Dressed Man
Every girl's crazy 'bout one.

Also in July: Miss Susie Had A Steamboat
This one has more relevance, because I did sing this alot as a kid.

August 23: Chicago - Hard Habit to Break
"Being without you, takes alot of getting uuUUUssed toooo...."

August 24: The Christmas Song ('Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...')
Again, a xmas song playing in my head in the middle of summer

August 31: Jim Croce - I'll Have to Say I Love You In a Song
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGtR8AJFuqw

September 14: The Beatles - I saw her standing there
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzKAHk-jd-Q&feature=related

And to wrap up the year, I guess it's good to get a motivating song that sets you for the new year.
December 6, I woke up to Whitney Houston's Greatest Love of All playing in my head.

I was thinking of making a playlist of these. The only problem is that I don't particularly like any of these songs. Maybe next year I can get a better list.

A Long Wait

I was so excited about getting one, I ate half of it before thinking of taking a picture.

McDonalds is selling their Holiday pie again.

When I was 16, I missed it. I thought I would just get one the following year when the season came around again. They didn't sell it again. I tried to check each holiday season, & was disappointed. I really wanted to try that pie. Now 13 years later, I finally got a holiday pie.

I almost thought I wasn't going to get one. When I ordered, I asked if they had it. She said 'No, just apple & pumpkin.' I thought 'oh well' and ordered one of each. But when I opened the pumpkin box, lo, there was my holiday pie. I was so excited.

It's really good. It's like a sugar cookie, only not as sweet. It's moist though because of the custard filling. I'm glad I did not forget about that pie these 13 years.

Foodisms

Jae made Taco's for dinner tonight. She said, when we have taco's for dinner, we don't say "I made taco's for dinner." We say "It's taco night!".
No one says "It's soup & salad night." or "It's spaghetti night." We just say "We're having [this] for dinner". What's so special about tacos that we have to dedicate the theme of our evening to it?

I've said this before, but it reminds me of "french" food. When you add the word "french" in front of something, it's basically just a greedier version of something common you eat.

'French' Apple Pie is just apple pie with icing on top.
'French' Onion Soup is onion soup with cheese melted on top.
'French' toast is regular toast that is dipped in egg and fried.

Also, you can make a "salad" just by adding mayonaise to a bowl of cut up [insert food item here]. Think about it, egg salad, potato salad, chicken salad, macaroni salad are all just the indicated food items mixed up with mayonaise.

Have you ever noticed that something with the word 'cream' or 'creme' in it is just a sweeter version of the normal food item? I got a vanilla 'cream' soda, and it just tasted lighter because it is sweeter. Or those caramel creams? They're not filled with cream. It's a sugar paste in the center. So when something says "cream", they really just mean sugar. I don't know where they made that leap.

So coming up with a good name is important for getting people to like your food, especially if it's a recipe you made up.

Alot of my favorite meals my Mom made were dishes she made up. It's just she never came up with a proper name for it. So she would say "Would you like some of my pumpkin stuff?" You should never use the word ''stuff'' to describe a dish. ('stuffed' is okay, but not 'stuff') I ended up just calling her food 'slop'. I might as well, because that is funnier.

I Better Now

I was pretty sad much of today, because I had a dream last night I was holding baby Silas. Filip walked in on me crying by myself in the kitchen. He asked me if I was sad. I told him yes. So he put his arms around me and kept saying "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry Mommy." He patted my back, ga_e me a kiss and wiped my tears with his fingers.
How could I not feel better after that?

Afterward, he asked me "Did someone hit you?" He said that, because one of his little friends hit him the other day and made him cry. I held him and comforted him much the same way he did to me today. So he thought that someone must of hit me to make me cry.

I told him no, & I was just crying because I missed the baby. Then he told me again he was 'so sorry'. He said ''So sorry, when girls cry, sad with baby Silas.''
What a blessing my son is.

A is for Atom

I'm trying to learn about Atoms and really small stuff.

An atom is made of 3 things: First, the positi_ely charged protons, and neutral neutrons that clump together to make the nucleus. Then, there are negati_e electrons that orbit the nucleus, just like planets orbit the sun in outer space.

The number of protons in an atom determine which element it is. If there is 1 proton in the atom, it is a Hydrogen atom. If there are 6 protons, it is a Carbon atom. If there are 26 protons, it's Iron, and so on. The top left corner of a box in the periodic table (the atomic number) indicates how many protons there are in that type of atom.

For it to be considered an atom, there must be an equal amount of electrons as protons to cancel out an o_erall electric charge. If it is missing an electron, it does not change what element it is (bc the number of protons has not changed) but it will be called an ion, since it now has an electric charge.

On the Bill Nye episode, he demonstrated how much space there is between a nucleus and the electrons that surround it. Remember those 'bumble balls' we had in the 90's? It's a battery powered, shaky ball, about the size of a grapefruit. Anyway, he strapped that to a pole, and ran 500 meters away. Then, he showed a dot about the size of a pencil eraser at that distance. So atoms, are mostly a bunch of nothing. We don't squish into things, because the electrons are mo_ing around the nucleus so fast, it's as if the whole atom is solid.

If you're looking at an element on the periodic table, you can find out how many protons, electrons, and neutrons there are in that atom. The number in the top left corner is the amount of protons, which I said before. For it to be considered an atom, there must be an equal amount of electrons.

The number on the bottom of the element box helps you find out the amount of neutrons.
If you look at the bottom number of atomic number 28 (which happens to be nickel) you will see 58.6934. Round it up to 59, and subtract 28 (the number of protons). There you ha_e it: 31 neutrons.

If that atom actually has a different number of neutrons, it is called an isotope. It is still an atom, but it is a lighter or hea_ier _ersion of it.

I found some great sources for the abo_e. Here they are:

I watched the Bill Nye episode 'Atoms', and also talked to my Dad.

Then there is this great song on YouTube by 'They Might Be Giants' at this link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-wf8S9vRvo
It's called 'Meet the Elements'.

Found a 'dynamic' periodic table at this site: http://www.ptable.com/

How to read a periodic table:
http://www.ehow.com/how_4716922_read-periodic-table-elements.html

Using the table to determine how many protons, electrons, & neutrons in an atom:
http://education.jlab.org/qa/pen_number.html

Tuco

We're dog-sitting Tuco this weekend. He's a snuggly pug.

I'm amazed at how much he can go to the bathroom. He poops just about e_ery time I take him out, which is 5-6 times a day. But he only eats twice a day. When I bring him in after a decent walk, he acts kind of weird, like he thinks something bad is about to happen. Afterward, he settles down on my lap if I'm sitting.

He's only been here 2 days, but we could figure out his routine from the start. He always waits until we are almost done eating before he eats. He will poop outside after walking for 5 minutes. He also seems to nap once in the morning, and once in the e_ening. For the rest of the time, he just sits.

Since his Mom speaks Spanish, he responds more if I pronouce 'Tuco' in Spanish (duco). If I say 'tew ko' like an American, he just flinches his ears. If I say something he does not understand, he stares at me with his big black eyes and cocks his head to the side. It's cute, so alot of times I gi_e commands to him that he doesn't know. ("Go shine my shoes!")

I'm glad we had a chance to watch him here. It doesn't really make me want a dog, but we had fun nontheless.

Circles

Circles are round, the earth, and our time
I trod on ahead, I cannot rewind
Pictures and memories look back to the past
They bring some comfort, and I will be back
I'll walk 'round the circle, drawn with a straight line

You left my body, your mother, your kind
In hopes that some strangers would help you survive
You did come back, a box full of ash
You drew a cruel circle around

A year is round, I left you behind
In rainy October of 2009
What can I do, but to keep on my path?
Keep on remembering you in my past
When I hold you again, I'll walk a straight line
We'll draw a kind circle around.

Chart

Thinking of submitting this to www.graphjam.com

Memorial Brochure Inside

Baby Silas came into this world on a Sunday. He was born the same minute the Harvest Moon rose at 6:26 am, October 4, 2009. He lived until Thursday 12:45am, a little longer than 90 hours.

The majority of the 90 hours, he spent in his own home with his family. He was born in Filip’s playroom. With my midwife Liz, and her assistant Melissa in attendance, his father caught him, and gave him to me, his mother. I held him in my arms while JR cut his cord. Then we woke Filip up to meet his new baby brother.

Silas’ Mom Mom, Pop Pop, Aunt Jae and Cousin Tyler arrived and met him a half-hour later. He was laying in bed with me. Then, his Grandma and Grandpa arrived. Everyone got to hold him.

Later, Silas got to meet more friends. The next days Leeza with Morgan came. Leeza held him for many hours. Rebecca also visited, and held him.

Since he seemed to be uncomfortable, we took him to Dr. Staley, our chiropractor. He examined him, and gave him an adjustment. It seemed to help, he calmed down immediately. Noemi, the receptionist, held him and rocked him. That also seemed to soothe him.

So in 90 hours, Silas got to meet 16 people who were friends, family, and loved ones. This baby had the opportunity to be loved, cuddled and held by many people we knew. For those who know JR personally, would you expect his son to know any fewer people than that?

At this point, we don’t know exactly what caused his death. It was a mystery to the doctors at Children’s Hospital where he died. The events surrounding his death gave us the opportunity to rely completely on our Creator.

Psalms 16:8 says “I have placed Jehovah in front of me constantly. Because he is at my right hand, I shall not be made to totter.”

It was quite apparent that our God was holding our right hand during this hard time, as we navigated through medical decisions to make a choice that would keep our consciences clear.

Revelation 21:5 says “Look! I am making all things new.”

Looking at our baby boy, I see something Jehovah created. If he was able to make something as beautiful as Silas now, how much easier it will be for him to make Silas again, when those words in Revelation are fulfilled.

That is when He will call, and my baby Silas will answer. May we all be there to hear those voices.

More cookies?

Let's say you only want one box of Girl Scout cookies, when a Girl Scout comes to your door. She offers to sell you 5 boxes. You tell her you will purchase one box. She says 'how about 3?'. You concede, because it's not the 5 boxes she was expecting to sell you.

It was a simple marketing tactic that even a child can perform. She caused you to purchase 3 times the amount that you wanted to buy in the first place. Your motivation? Perhaps guilt, a sense of 'doing the right thing', or just wanting to get this transaction over with. There are many possible reasons.
Her motivation? To sell as many cookies as possible.

The media has always pushed getting your flu shot every year. This year, pharmaceutical companies expect to triple their sales (by a very conservative estimate) of 'pandemic' flu shots for the Swine Flu. (see http://edition.cnn.com/2009/TRAVEL/07/22/swine.flu.drugs/index.html )

Whether someone gets these shots or not is a personal decision. Smart marketing tends to get on the personal level though. Some people are great supporters of vaccines, and others are quite the opposite. Say you're an average person who got all your shots as a kid, and would get the flu shot if something you wanted to be a part of (a new job perhaps) required it. You're not the type though, to run out to get an unrequired shot on your own.

The media/government/pharmaceutical companies work together to 'educate' us as to what's available to 'protect' yourself. In effect, it's someone coming to your door offering to sell you this experimental*** vaccine for each member of your family. Children should get two, one in each arm. Also, they offer the regular vaccine that you, your spouse and kids should get as well for the 'normal' flu that actually kills more people than the pandemic flu.

'Whoa, that's alot of shots' you may say. "I don't trust all that N1H1 stuff, I'll just take the normal flu shot, and whatever is mandated for the kids, so they don't get kicked out of school.''
Sound's reasonable.
Ask yourself, if you never heard of N1H1, and did not have to worry about required shots for school, would you be even getting that 'reasonable' amount of vaccinations? With that decision you made, you probably purchased 3 times or more shots than you would have not being exposed to marketing. Isn't that much the same as a girl scout overshooting how many boxes of cookies you should buy?

When our friends or people we know say something about our personal health care decisions, it's easier to get our back up about it. This is justified, because this is a personal decision . It's generally not the business of anyone else.
However, we cannot allow clever (or even basic) marketing make this decision for us. Just because it's not a person telling you what you should do, does not mean it's not overstepping it's proper place.

Please, do research on how the immune system works. Look at test results from an actual study, not just the cliff notes from a magazine article. Learn about the risks of dying, and treatment for someone who actually contracts the disease.

We all need to avoid the tendency to make this decision the same way we make the decision to buy a $5 foot-long, or insurance from a lizard. It's more important than making a consumer purchase.

*** The N1H1 vaccine has been tested on many volunteers. However, no one can know the long term affects of this, since it's a new shot. It would be very difficult, if not impossible, to know if any vaccination is the cause of a chronic disease that took years to develop in a person's system.

Memorial Service

The Memorial Service for Baby Silas Andrews is this Saturday, October 17 at 3:30pm

It is open to everyone, and is held at FSK Holiday Inn Conference Center.
It's located in Frederick, Md on 5400 Holiday Drive. This is right behind the FSK mall.

We are expecting a sizable attendance. Please come early to make time for parking and finding a seat.

My Father, My God and Friend

This is the other song we will be singing at the memorial. Both of these songs are available in a vocal and piano version on the website.
Also, I have a scan of the piano score on my computer. Let me know in a comment if you want me to send it to you.

(Hebrews 6:10)

1. Life in this world can be hard.
Life in this world can bring tears and pain.
Still ev’ry day I will say,
“My life is not in vain.”

(CHORUS)
For God is not unrighteous,
And he remembers the love I’ve shown.
So he is ever near me;
With Jehovah, I’m not alone.
Yes, God is my provider
and my protector down to the end.
Yes, Jehovah is my Father,
My God and Friend.

2. Gone are the days of my youth;
Days of calamity now are here.
Still through the eyes of my faith,
My hope is bright and clear.

(CHORUS)
For God is not unrighteous,
And he remembers the love I’ve shown.
So he is ever near me;
With Jehovah, I’m not alone.
Yes, God is my provider
and my protector down to the end.
Yes, Jehovah is my Father,
My God and Friend.

(See also Ps. 71:17, 18.)

He Will Call

This will most likely be one of the songs we'll sing at the funeral. You can download the song to listen to at the website in vocal or piano. It's song 111.
Let me know if you're interested in a chord chart for this. I spent some time this morning learning it and writing out a score.

(Job 14:13-15)

1. Life, like a mist, appears for just a day,
Then disappears tomorrow.
All that we are can quickly fade away,
Replaced with tears and sorrow.
If a man should die, can he live again?
Hear the promise God has made:

(CHORUS)
He will call; The dead will answer.
They shall live at his command.
For he will have a longing
For the work of his own hand.
So have faith, and do not wonder,
For our God can make us stand.
And we shall live forever,
As the work of his own hand.

2. Friends of our God, though they may pass away,
Will never be forsaken.
All those asleep who in God’s mem’ry stay,
From death he will awaken.
Then we’ll come to see all that life can be:
Paradise eternally.

(CHORUS)
He will call; The dead will answer.
They shall live at his command.
For he will have a longing
For the work of his own hand.
So have faith, and do not wonder,
For our God can make us stand.
And we shall live forever,
As the work of his own hand.

(See also John 6:40; 11:11, 43; Jas. 4:14.)(Job 14:13-15)

Baby Silas 10/4/09-10/8/09

We're all over the place emotionally. Seems like I go from joking around, to crying, to telling the story over and over with no emotion. There has been so much support though. I'm very grateful for many things, like being surrounded by so many friends when he died.

Silas was struggling & looking uncomfortable from the start. We just could not pinpoint what was wrong. His vitals were all good, and he seemed to improve. Yesterday, the Dr. told us to take him to hospital b/c of his breathing. Before we put him in the car, blood started coming out of his nose & mouth. The paramedics came and took him to FMH, and then they flew him to Children's Hospital. He was in critical condition the entire time. He died at 12:45am today.

I know the whole thing is so shocking, and everyone is so sad. There have been so many things that have been a comfort to me. Silas is in Jehovah's memory, and I'll be among so many holding their babies again.

Also, this experience gave us an opportunity to prove our integrity. The FMH doctor was very confrontational about blood transfusions, which we refused. At both hospitals, they had obtained court orders to transfuse him anyway. The Hospital Liason Committee helped us reason with the Doctor into considering safer, non-blood alternatives. The Doctor became more reasonable, and was positive about allowing the transfer to Children's without him receiving blood.
At Children's, the care was excellent. This hospital is much more open to alternatives to blood transfusions. They exhausted every option available, but poor Silas' lungs were already gone. They were just about to disregard our wishes regarding blood in a last ditch effort to save him. However, my baby went into cardiac arrest, and died before they got the chance.

I am so grateful for all the kind words, prayers & assistance by my friends and family, and even people I don't know personally. Silas' little life of 4 days has touched so many people, and built up the faith of many.

Job spoke of his hope of a resurrection in chapter 14:15 where he said "You will call, and I myself shall answer you. For the work of your hands you will have a yearning."

Silas is going to answer that call, and will be able to live a life where he will never be bereaved. In the meantime, JR, Filip, myself, and so many more will wait for that day.

Again, thank you everyone for your support.

Gettin' Smart

My friend started to tell me about how she's 'unschooling' her daughter. It's not a hard concept to practice, but it's harder to explain it. Everyone has their own definition of it.
Filip is 2 1/2, which means he is half-way to school age. This method of teaching is having more of an appeal to me than regular school, or normal home-school methods.

Even for toddlers, there are tons of age-appropriate activities available. I took him to a story-time at the library. It seems we're supposed to do things like this to 'socialize' our kids and give them 'stimulation'. I have no motivation to do stuff like this for my son. I thought, I'm just being lazy, so I made myself go. Actually, we just happened to be at the library when it started, so we sat in.
The kids there all seemed to like the program, they got to listen to a story, and sing some songs. There was nothing wrong with it, but the same question keeps popping into my head:"Why?"

Why teach your kids songs you hate, because they're kid songs? Why do you need a felt board to teach them what kind of animals live on a farm? Why do we make them imagine the things we feel are appropriate for them to imagine? Why do we need annoying, fictitious charactors to be our kids' role models in washing their hands and having good manners?

My personal definition for 'unschooling' will change as Filip grows. At this point, it's pretty straight-forward. If he needs an 'age appropriate' activity, he uses his imagination and makes one up.
If I want him to learn about something new, I show him something real. Like, take him to the farm where we buy our eggs to learn about animals. At this point, he knows nothing about pigs. That's because the farm we go to does not have any. He knows all about chickens, and their behavoir. This isn't because he put the little chicken in the felt chicken coop on a felt board. It's from experience.
If he needs 'stimulation' or just plain entertainment, we watch stuff that appeals to the whole family. Last week, we went to the coffee shop and listened to a live Irish band. I would rather train my kid to be someone interesting enough for me to hang out with, than artificially creating friends for him through many 'playdates'.

Don't get me wrong, I do the 'playdate' thing, and the 'kid movie' thing, and I'm not against storytime (especially since reading is so important). It just does not replace his real education that comes thru example, imagination, and spending our life together.

My New Chair

This is my new chair I got from Ikea. JR had taken over my rocking chair, so I finally got myself a comfy seat. I got a kiddie version of the same chair for Filip, but he seems to prefer mine. If he's not in the chair himself, he's sitting on the arm of the chair while I'm in it.

He also took over my maternity pillow. Now, he sleeps through the night, surrounded by the entire pillow like a nest.

Tomatoes

We did not do a garden this year. JR noticed this tomato plant growing out of our compost heap though. I've been taking my kitchen scraps out here every day for weeks, and never noticed it!

Gross!

Fil decided to read his book about ants while he was sitting on my lap. He started freaking out, and hitting the book. He was screaming "Stop it! Stop it!". I looked over, and he had it turned open to a creepy, full page picture of red ants tending their larvae. He was getting more and more scared and grossed out the longer he looked at it.

He Can Read! Not really...

I was amazed a couple weeks back when Filip saw a pen that said 'Hilton' on it, with the only logo being a 4 leaf symbol or something like that.
He said "Jae! Jae!"
My sister Jae works at the Hilton.

Today he did it again. We were going through a pile of worthless credit cards I have. He started saying "Bank card, Bank card!" and searching through the pile. I told him
"They're not bank cards, they're called credit cards"
Then he found a card that I never use, from PNC, the bank I go to. I couldn't even tell you what the logo to my bank looks like, but he spotted it in my stack of cards.

"Mommy"

Filip is being especially clingy today. I was trying to ignore him while he kept saying in his whiny voice
"Mommy Mommy Mommy Mommy Mommy...."
Then I got fed up. I said
"STOP calling me Mommy"

He paused for a second, and responded.
"Joeln, Joeln, Joeln..."

Papers

I decided it's my responsibility to put away JR's paperwork. I think I'm going to be much happier for it.

For the past 4 years, I've been stressing out over how he doesn't file his important papers, and continues to accumulate more. I tried to go through his stacks of papers, and throw out the trash. That way, it would be easier for him to sort it out when he does get around to it. However, I realized that he never will get around to it completely.

To his credit, he has sat down and gone through some of his papers several times since we've been married. This only happens after I am completely stressed out from the lack of organization.

So this morning, I decided that it was my job to keep up with his files for work. I threw out an entire laundry basket full of 'important papers', saving only the things I knew how to deal with. Then, I created files for his clients. He was just putting the papers for them on the kitchen table or his cabinet. After 4 years of looking at this, I think I'm going to be mostly done by lunchtime!

It just goes to show you how much easier it is to change yourself to relieve stress, than expect someone else to change for you.

Instinct

Filip has only seen 2 superhero shows, Catwoman and Incredibles. I told him we're probably never going to see Catwoman again, since that was one of the dumbest movies I've seen. Yet, he still remembers her, and he points out girls that resemble Halle Berry.

When we were going through a pile of hand-me-downs, he pointed to a shirt and asked:
"What's that?".
"It's Spiderman". I said.
"Oh" he replied. That was the end of the conversation.

A few weeks later, he found his cousin's sunglasses in my Mom's house. They were basic glasses that were red and blue, and they had a spiderweb on the frames. Nothing else.
"Spar-man glasses! Mommy, spar-man glasses!" He said excitedly.

Ever since then, he points out Spiderman whenever he sees him. Today, he cupped his hands over his eyes and informed me that he was Spiderman. The kid has never watched a Spiderman show, and now he's pretending to be him. He doesn't even know what Spiderman does.

Parents who spend the majority of their time with their kids have a great deal of power over what their kid is exposed to. They should be their child's strongest influence. However, I'm learning that power is not absolute.

Who teaches little boys to make engine sounds with their toy cars, or shoes, or whatever they have on hand? They automatically do it. Filip has been making car sounds since before he could talk. Now, they have developed into more sophisticated car sounds that include gear changes sounds.

It's amazing how much instinct is wrapped up in a little kid. It only takes the smallest exposure (like seeing a T-Shirt) to bring it in full force.
Maybe I should dress up like Catwoman when I clean the house. Then he might get into doing chores, because a superhero is doing it.

Our New Baby

We've been potty training Filip for about 2 months now. He finally got to the point where he would hold it when he had to go pee until we sat him on the potty. Then, he gave that up.

We're out of diapers, and he peed his underpants. He knows that only babies go to the bathroom in their pants.

Since he wants to be a baby, I'm going to treat him like one. That means no more movies, because babies don't watch TV. Each time he goes in his pants, I'm going to take away a 'big kid' privilege. The next thing is he gets to ride the backward facing car seat. If this lasts until the weekend, he will have to be in Mommy or Daddy's arms the whole time at the meeting, because babies can't take off to be with their friends.

Well This is Different

I'm sitting here at Mom's watching Jr improve his score at Wii Bowling. He's been practicing for quite some time. It's been about 3 years since the last time I've seen him do something interesting like this.
Last time, it was Suduko. He stayed up late one night, studying all the techniques for being good at Suduko, and working the puzzles. Then I never saw him pick up a puzzle again.

Piano Class

Today was the 'celebration' class for my group piano lessons. I taught them 9 weekly classes, and they were prepared to perform a solo, as well as an ensemble piece for all the parents.
I finally figured out how to make this class fun, yet productive. The group I had happened to be very good too.
My boss is trying to set up one more class that will run just for the month of August. I'm hoping it turns out. We just need one more beginner student, age 6 to 9 in order to have the class.

If you or anyone you know is interested, call Down Town Piano Works at 301 631 1234

Wellness- Just Do It

I borrowed the air ionizer at Mom's house to use at my house. It's a fairly expensive machine. I got it at my old job years ago, and left it at Mom's. It's supposed to recreate what thunderstorms do in our homes. It puts positive and negative ions in the air, in order to maximize our physical wellness.

Mom uses it whenever the dog pees in the house to get the smell out. She says it works great. So I got to give it a really good cleaning, and replace the plates and filters in it. If I did that, the air in our home would be of similar quality as walking in the woods or the mountains.

I also have my sprout barrel which has been broke for a few months. I have no idea how to fix that, but it probably is nothing more than calling the 800 number and ordering replacement parts. Then, I could grow the most nutritive, living salad you can get.

Since I'm not growing wheatgrass in the barrel, we have a $200 juicer that is sitting dormant. All I have to do is go to the health store and buy one of their huge bags of wheat grass. If I started juicing it, we would have the most complete and bio-available nutrients known to man in our diet.

After all the exercise I got on vacation, I felt so energized when I got home. I could totally maintain that feeling if I just go downstairs and walk on the treadmill (that we got for free) 30 minutes a day.

I also have an electric teapot that broke. If I got that fixed, I could stop boiling my water in our cheap, teflon-coated pots so I wouldn't be ingesting carcinogens with every cup of tea I drink.

I'm arms length away from drastically improving the quality of my life. All it would take is a few online orders for parts, a little cleaning up, and a shopping trip to the health store.

Why do I wait?

Dog-Sitting

We're staying at my Mom's house while they're out of town this weekend. We have to watch Annie-dog, and the cat. Dylan also has a lizard that I have not done anything for. He didn't say anything about feeding it.

I thought it would be really funny if I bleached Annie's tail. I put bleach water on it, and then dipped it in lemon juice. So far, no change. I'm going to get a bottle of peroxide next.

It's going to be so hilarious.

It's Just a Stamp!

You know what alot of people hate spending money on? Postage.
Sure, the price of postage has almost doubled since I was a kid, but it's still under a buck.

Whenever I finish preaching in a neighborhood I'm assigned to, I run all the not-at-homes I have through yellow.com and write letters to each address I get an actual name for. Last time, I had to mail 40 letters. It cost $18 to mail them. The reaction of many to that is "it's so expensive!"
You know how long it would take me to hand deliver those envelopes? I think $18 is worth it.

Really, you're spending 44 cents for a service that would cost you hours of time, and perhaps a couple hundred bucks (depending on where you're going) to perform yourself.

We waste money on all kinds of things. If you buy new clothes from a store, by default you're wasting money. Retail stores (even Walmart) won't sell anything for less than 2 1/2 times what they're worth. Since it's clothes, we get excited, especially if it was 'on sale'.
I have a friend that thinks $30 for a single person at a restaurant she likes is a 'not too expensive', but she balks at buying stamps to send off her letters.

I think the only reason people hate buying stamps is because stamps are not fun. They're associated with humorless postal workers, paying bills and standing in line. So we turn it into

"Postage is so expensive!"

Lips

This one is funnier

Filip 18 months

I found this clip from my old camera card. I think he's about 18 months old here.

Bye Kelsi

Just got back from a goodbye Kelsi picnic. It was fun.

We sang Karaoke, ate hot dogs, and other people played volleyball. I think there were people playing softball and basketball too. I missed the water balloon fight.

Filip fell asleep within 5 minutes of leaving the park. He played with his new truck that his Pop Pop bought him most of the time. I got to hang out with Anna.

Midwife Care

This is a post about child-birth. So a lot of you might just want to plug your ears.

I'm planning a home-birth with a midwife. Saying that, makes a lot of people consider the possible risk of that, vs. a hospital birth almost immediately. Since most people here give birth in hospitals, my choice is quite 'alternative'.

My first son was born at a birthing center, with all my care done by midwives. Since then, they have had to shut down the birthing part, as too many mothers opted for the hospital birth. They work in a practice now that gives the option of either having a doctor or a midwife do your prenatal care. Since midwives are banned from practicing in hospitals in MD, it's required for doctors to call the shots. Since that was the case, I decided to have a midwife that did home births.

Each prenatal visit my midwife makes, (she comes to my home) I give her a scenario of the last 'bad birth story' I heard. When you're pregnant, you get to hear a lot of these. I ask her what she would do in a situation like that. Each time, her attitude toward the scenario is that there are 'normal' things you can do to solve the problem, or maybe it's not even a
problem, just a factor. At the very last resort, she would even consider sending you to the hospital.

An example. I met a mother who was disappointed that she could not give birth naturally, but had to have a C-Section. She said her water broke, but the labor failed to progress. The doctor said she had to deliver within 24 hours, to protect against infection and the baby won't get sick. Her midwife wanted her to wait it out. The doctor was nice enough to let her wait 36 hours, but then said they had to either induce or have a C-Section. So she ended up having surgery to extract the child out of her.

As asked my midwife what she would do in a situation where the water breaks, but labor fails to progress. Her assistant told me that the doctor's standard of care is actually that a woman must give birth within 24 hours of a vaginal exam after the water breaks. It's not the water breaking that causes infection. It's the opening everything up and checking if she's dilated. That's when she gets exposed to becoming infected. When people intervene.

So, what is the first thing they do at a hospital when a woman's water breaks? Of course, vaginal exam. Now the mother is at risk for infection.

Not to worry though, they're all set up with pictocin which induces your labor. However, it induces labor so quickly that the mother does not have time to learn to cope with the extreme pain that she would of slowly gotten used to naturally. Therefore, she has to get an epidural. This kills the pain, as well as much of the feeling on the bottom half of her body. So she can't give birth in a normal squatting position, she has to be flat on her back, pushing the baby uphill.
Many times, this is much too hard. A body traumatized by too much intervention, which is putting stress on the baby in the meantime, may not be up for the hard physical task of labor.

Because, labor is work. Are you allowed to show up to work on drugs? Only the ones given by a doctor. So I guess it's okay.

Anyway, my midwife said for a woman's water to break, but not going into labor is rare. If it happened to one of the mothers she cares for, she would not even visit her for 24 hours, so as not to be tempted to make an exam. Thus, protecting the mother from infection. There are precautions that the mother must take during this time. Also, there are natural remedies that can help a mother go into labor, but does not force it.

So my reason for choosing a home-birth with a midwife, is not necessarily because I think hospital care is lacking. If anything, it's quite the opposite. It's more because I agree with the logic process behind midwifery than 'conventional' methods.
A midwife views the mother as a person, who has the strength to go through this normal, biological process herself. That's what we're made for.
A doctor's view tends to take that strength away from the mother. He views it as his job (which he has nurses to attend the boring part for him) to extract the baby from it's human vessel.

Many people appreciate this, because a fully equipped hospital, full of 'experts' inspires confidence. Also, they have the solution to all the things that could go 'wrong'.

I think that many of these things that are 'wrong', may just be things that you just deal with, not necessarily intervene medically.
So I'm choosing to introduce my baby to the world right where it's going to live, home.

Organized

I organized my basement office today. It's not really an office, since I don't like spending time there. It's just a basement place to store office supplies.

I have these plastic 'drawer chests' that you can get at any office store. I had a total of 28 drawers filled with different office supplies. However, I was able to streamline my organization with an accordian file. Now, I'm down to 15 drawers. I eliminated an entire chest of drawers, and put alot of things in smaller places that I can keep upstairs where it's convenient.

I also eliminated an entire file drawer. I got rid of all the files I don't need. I ended up with 4 empty binders I can use for something else, and a stack of empty file folders I didn't realize I had. We were just about to buy a new box of them.

I'm always surprised at how much I can still simplify.

So Annoying

I hate when this happens. Last night, I had the most boring dream.

I dreamed my Dad and brother came over early in the morning. They didn't want breakfast, so I offered them tea.

I was unsure if they wanted black tea or green tea, so I offered them both darjeeling. They both accepted. Then I realized that Dad liked coffee better. So I asked if he wanted that instead. He said sure. Then I had to decide if I should make him both the tea and the coffee, since he drinks alot of caffeine in the morning anyway. Then I had to decide what mug to use. I thought about giving them paper to-go cups, because it looked like Dad was in a hurry. However, I realized that I had a coffee mug that I had borrowed from Mom. So I figured I would pour it in that, so he could just take it home. After making, and then re-making his tea, because something went wrong, I poured him his darjeeling. He told me he brought his own mug he wanted to use. So I poured it out of that cup, and into his cup. Then I had the idea of making his coffee, and putting it in the cup I needed to return to Mom.

It just went on and on and on! So basically my dream consisted of me puttering around the kitchen fretting about hot beverages for an entire morning.

Pearls before Swine

I bought this cute, red, unlined notebook a long time ago. I was saving it for something special. I just didn't know what I was going to use it for yet.

Last month, Jr spotted it, and asked me if he could use it. I reluctantly said yes. The one condition I gave him is that he had to use it for something special, and not just use it as scrap paper like he would use any other notebook. He told me it was going to be his 'to do list' book and nothing else. So I said ok.

So a month later, I found it sitting in his pile of papers he accumulates. I asked him if he is using it as his 'to do list' book, or did he use it once and forget all about it. He looked thru it, and saw one incomplete list that was dated a month ago.

So yes, he used it once and forgot all about it.
I asked for it back. He says
"No, you said I could have it. "
I tell him "I said you could have it on a condition that you did not follow"

He told me he just forgot, and he was going to use it now.

Motherhood Marketing

I was thinking again about how much marketing has shaped our personal opinions on raising kids. Americans tend to potty train their kids at a later age than people in other countries. The result of this tendency maximizes profits for the diaper industry, because people are buying disposable diapers for longer.

I hear a re-occuring phrase whenever I'm reading about this subject. It's always something to the effect of: "you have to wait until they're ready". Parenting magazines offer articles that show the ''signs'' that your child is ready to be potty trained. Overall, we have a very relaxed view as to how quickly we should get our kids out of diapers.

When it comes to nursing though, people tend to feel strongly about how long they let their kid latch on. It's very rare to see a mother nursing a toddler. Non-parents tend to think these women are just weird.

Some mothers would like to nurse longer, but find that their milk supply is not enough for their baby. People forget that once you start feeding other food to your baby, you stop making as much milk yourself. They start feeding them food more, and before you know it, many babies lost interest in nursing. When I took Filip in for a check-up at 3 months old, my doctor said to start introducing food at 4 months. Also, formula companies throw samples at new mothers left and right. They know that once you start formula, it's a slippery slope towards using it exclusively.
I'm curious as to where my doctor got the information to tell her patients to introduce food to babies that early. I would not be surprised if it came from a milestone chart created by a leading formula company.

I've heard many people say something to the effect of "If they're old enough to {have teeth; talk; eat; etc} they're old enough to stop nursing." However, I hardly ever hear any similar remarks about rushing potty training.

Hence, we're slow to potty train, and quick to wean. Who benefits? Logically, it is the driving forces behind this cultural view, big business. Our cultural opinions, that we hold so dear, are maximizing profits for businesses, and taking away nurturing, and a sense of achievement from our babies.

Good Morning

Since I wrote my obligatory non-Filip post on jewelry to show I have other interests, I have to say something about my son.

He's the easiest kid to take care of. He had too much sugar before we went to bed, so he was awake when we were going to sleep. He still climbed in bed with us and tried to sleep, but could not. So I popped in Napoleon Dynamite and went to sleep myself. He stayed up until midnight, then got out of bed when he was tired and turned the TV off. Then he went to sleep next to me.

So he's sleeping in this morning. It's rare for him to sleep in the bed past when I wake up, but I've been up for over an hour. (Hence, me being able to post 2 blogs)

Vibrant Artwear

I got new jewels yesterday.

Vibrant Artwear is a great place to go for nice-looking costume jewelry. It's this bright blue and pink building on the corner of Market and 4th. You have to walk farther than the cute part of Market street.

The clothes there are cheap, they have some vintage stuff. I was not that interested in their clothes. However, the whole upstairs is a display of cheap necklaces, bracelets and earrings. The necklaces and bracelets are $2 each, and most of the earrings were under $1. Even though it's that cheap, there was some really cute stuff there.

All the jewelry is organized by color. So it's the perfect place to go if you need to find something that matches a particular outfit. I bought 3 necklaces: black, orange, and pink. Then I got dangle earrings to match each of them. They were just a sing bead on a hook pin.

Accessorizing is fun!

The Gift

I had a dream just before I woke up that I was still enjoying the gift of singleness.

My friends and I were all working our pioneer assignment. We all lived in a van reminiscent of the mystery-mobile on Scooby Doo. I had no responsibilities except to preach. Best of all, it was a time in my life when I could go all day without someone entering my personal space, and no one ever touched my body except for the occasional hand-shake or hug.

I woke up to Filip wanting to nurse and hold me. Then, he got in my face asking me to feed him.
"Mommy, eat eggs, mommy, eat eggs, EAT EGGS!"

That was a nice dream.

Hatchlings

Welcome baby birdies! Their eyes are not even opened yet.

Our New Neighbors

Robin's nest right near our back door. Kim pointed it out to me.

Cookie Fail

I had to make cookies this morning for the people working at Crownsville. My first batch turned out perfect.
I smoked out the house, because I used a pizza pan with holes punched in it for my 2nd batch. The cookie batter dripped through the holes and started burning on the floor of the oven. Thankfully, the smoke taste did not make it into the cookies.
I decided to put the oven on the clean setting for 3 hours before I bake the rest of the batches. I had left the cookies to cool on top of the stove. Now, when I tasted the cookies, they absorbed the 'oven cleaning' smell. Hopefully, I have enough cookie batter left to fill my 40 cookie quota.

Speaking of minor domestic crisis', I put Filip in the tub to take a bath. While he was bathing, I was washing out the light bulb globe that belongs to the ceiling light. He grabbed the globe while I was not looking. When I looked down, he was playing with shards of glass in the water. It must of broke under water. He didn't get cut thankfully.

Fun Day

Today we took Filip to the John Deere store for a tractor pull. They canceled it, but you could still walk around and see all the antique tractors on display.

Then, Lystra had 3 free tickets to Port Discovery in Baltimore that she couldn't use. So we went down there. Port Discovery is a museum for kids. It had alot of fun stuff to do. They had a pretend grocery store, where kids could go 'shopping' and then ring themselves up.

In the picture, is Filip 'driving' the VW beetle they had there. It was parked next to a pretend gas pump and air pump. So the kids could pump gas, and fill up the tires.

They had an animal show while we were there. So Filip got to see a snake, bearded dragon, gecko, tarantula, another kind of lizard, and this huge turtle.

The picture where he's in the balls was a little room for the 4 and under crowd. Once we made it there, I just kind of stayed in that room, because I was tired of walking around, and he was entertaining himself.

It was a pretty good museum. Big kids would get a kick out of the 'urban treehouse'. It was this habitrail type thing that was 3 stories high. They also had a bunch of creative stations where kids could decorate hats, or tiles and other stuff.

Rearranging

I balanced out our bedrooms these past couple of days. I'm working on creating space for a new baby.

Before, I did not store anything in my bedroom, because I wanted it to look as spacious as possible. We stored all our clothes in Filip's room. They were stored in bins which I kept on 4 tall shelving units all along his walls. For a year, we got used to it just being this storage room with toys in it.

Instead of displaying the bins on a bunch of shelves, I decided to have them tucked in the closets and other places between the two rooms. I also moved two shelf units to my room, where I now keep the little TV, media, and jewelry and most of our clothes.

So now, instead of having my room as a bed-shrine, and Filip's room a storage room for everything, we have a bedroom and a playroom.

Filip's room now has a table that covers most of my Herbalife stock. The rest of it is stored out of reach. He also has his playard that he plays in alot. My room now has a TV, so we can watch movies in bed without dragging the laptop in. Now, all we need is space for the new baby's stuff...

Advertising

I have never taken a marketing class, so I'm no expert on how advertising works. However, I find it really interesting how many companies have infiltrated consumers lives to the point where they are advertising on our own identities.

If I start a business, one of my largest expenses would be advertising my product and business name. I would spend money on various forms of advertising, in exchange for name recognition, and hopefully some sales.
So the burden of advertising falls on me, as the business owner. I take that burden, because it's worth the effort and expense.

That sounds reasonable. What I find amazing though, is how marketers have made it so consumers voluntarily take part of that burden upon themselves, to advertise to themselves.

Probably the most common form of this is the selling of T-Shirts. People pay money to see an attraction, then they pay money for a T-shirt that advertises the attraction. This advertises the attraction to the buyer each time they put the shirt on, and it advertises to everyone who see's the shirt. So, the consumer volunteers to pay money to advertise to himself and others.

My car insurance company offers a free logo t-shirt to any customer who brings in another customer to their business. Isn't that nice? They give me the privilege of advertising for them if we advertise enough to give them a sale.

I was teasing a friend, because she became a Facebook 'fan' of dozens of different consumer products. Alot of these 'fan' sites are not even sponsored by the product they're advertising. That means some average person went through the effort to create a fan-site with the logo, and get hundreds of people to attest that they're a 'fan' of this product. All of these people provided a service that a marketer would normally have to pay for, for free. On top of that, fans get regular updates on that product. So they volunteered themselves to be exposed to more advertising of a product they already consume and advertise.

I'm not saying I'm immune to this. I get excited about products and tell others about them as well. I've even bought T-shirts from places I've been. I think the motive for the Facebook 'fan' thing is usually just a way of decorating our profiles. It's not out of a desire to provide a free service to a gigantic corporation.
Yet, the profile is our online identity. In effect, we are advertising anything we put on it, be it ourselves, or for corporate entities. Remember the woman who was going to get a corporate logo tatooed to her forehead to the highest bidder? Profiles can be the online version of the same thing. Except we don't get paid for it.

Baker Park

Jr ran into Justin while he was taking Filip to Baker park. Justin happened to have his camera on him, and took a bunch of pics.

Sci-Fi

I had a Sci-Fi dream last night. We all lived on starships, and some of us realized what the true nature of our universe was, and some just lived in the universe oblivious to it.

I was trying to find out who knew, and who didn't through casual conversation. If a person understood what I was talking about when I said "get up to the top", they knew what our universe really was. If they just dismissed the remark as something that fit in with their ordinary day-to-day life, I knew they we're going to be in for a reality check at some point in their life.

The true nature of our universe in my dream was pretty interesting. It looked like we lived our existence on starships out in space. Actually, we were very tiny, so small that our ships lived on the back of a mangy dog. 'Outer space' was just all the hair and fleas all over him.

Craft Party

We had a craft party last night. We did a little bit of crafts at first. I worked on my rag rug. Agata and Stephanie worked on some cross-stitching, while Leeza knitted. Brittany worked on some jewelry designs, and looked up Saree's on the internet. Anitra and Jennifer didn't bring projects to do, so they just hung out.

After that, we went outside, because the weather was so nice. Jon went out and bought us pizza and beer. When it started to get dark, we built a fire in our pit. It was alot of fun. I think we should have another outdoor picnic.

Sustainable

I'm always trying to add habits to make my lifestyle more ecologically sustainable. I don't do anything too radical, but I try to be as conservative as possible. Here's some hippie stuff I like to do.

Reusing:

Egg Cartons: I return these to the farm where we buy our eggs.

Plastic Bags: I don't use cloth bags at the grocery store, but I do save the plastic ones. I use them for my small bathroom trash cans.

Plastic Cups: You know those big 32oz cups you get at McDonalds? They're great for making sure I drink enough water in the day.

Candle containers: I only buy candles where you can reuse the container. I've gotten some cute bowls this way. Just wipe out the excess wax when it's still soft and melted.

Plastic Take Home Boxes: They're perfect for packing a lunch for JR.

Freecycling: At www.freecycle.org, you can sign up for a local Yahoo group where you give stuff you don't need away for free. Plus you can sign up to pick up free stuff.

I have posted ads to get rid of alot of recyclables that people want. I save my salsa jars, and when I saved a box full, I never have a problem getting rid of it on Freecycle. I even have a person that will pick up my draft printer paper, because they don't want to use fresh paper for their unimportant stuff.

Sorting Trash: Doing this is a little more work. It's nice though, because the amount of trash we produce is greatly diminished. We can go 2-3 weeks before we have to take the bin down to the street on trash night.

Paper:I throw paper trash away separately from regular trash, and burn it in my backyard fire pit. Filip loves our weekly fires.

Recycle: Duh

Composting: I keep a compost bin in the back yard, and save all our food scraps for it. Because our food trash is out of it, our regular trash never smells.

Substitutes:

I use toilet paper instead of paper towels for small spills in the kitchen. For the larger ones, I use a wet rag.

ITunes instead of CD's. Everyone does this anyway.

Netflix instead of buying movies.

Internet instead of buying cookbooks or instruction books.

Whenever I get a liquid soap that I can't use on my skin, I use it to clean the bathroom. Just sud up a mesh sponge and scrub the tub and sink. It's less toxic chemicals than most bathroom cleaners.

Workout at home instead of the gym. Saves gas, time & money. Of course, if I didn't have a kid, I would be going to the gym.

I would love to hear your conserving ideas. Comment and let me know.

I'm up

It's 5:30am and I already hear birds outside.

Filip fell asleep in the backyard at 4:45pm yesterday for 6 hours. I brought him inside and put him on the kitchen floor at sundown. He woke up a little before 11pm, when I was about to go to bed. So he went to bed with me and slept until 4am.

That's why I had to wake up with the birds, and make him a 'moosie' and eggs.

Today, we're taking JR to work at 7am. I think I might come home and see if he'll take a nap with me until we go to our call at 11am. Then, some friends are having an open house for us to see their new baby goat. I want to take him there. By then, it should be time to pick up JR again. Then, it's my turn to go to work.

It's going to be a long day. Not because it's a hard day. It's just going to be long because I got up extra early for it.

Strength

Have you ever noticed that some foods are too hot to touch with your fingers, but they're okay to put in your mouth? Isn't that weird? I would think that my mouth is much more delicate than my fingers and therefore would not be able to withhold the temperature. However, it's the opposite.

It's the same with men and women. Women are more delicate than men, but they're the ones that endure the pain of childbirth. The only time a man would endure a similar pain would be when something is wrong, not in a normal, natural process.

Or it's like Formula 1 and Nascar. Nascar is more delicate, because they have to make the track perfect, with no turns (besides left) and the race is cancelled if it rains. Yet, they go faster on the races than F1.

Compare the strength of an ant compared to our own strength according to size. You'll notice that an ant can lift much more than their body weight. For humans though, it would take a great deal of strength training to be able to lift half our body weight. Yet, it takes like 2 seconds to squish an ant.

Spider webs are stronger than reinforced cable (when accounting for it's size). A person can destroy a spider's home by accident, and not even notice it though.

The most vulnerable people we know (our children) also have the most energy.

It makes me think of how Jehovah chooses 'the weak things of the world' to fulfill his purpose. It shows up over and over in nature. That's why Paul could say "When I am weak, then I am powerful."

Cinderella

I had a really nice dream last night. It was animated and everything.
I was Cinderella (the Disney version) dancing with the prince at the ball. Then, at midnight I had to leave.
However, instead of me actually getting away from the prince, he followed me down all the way to my step-mother's house, because I couldn't run that fast. He kept saying:
"How will I find you again?" It was dumb, because he was at my house. So he knew where I lived.
So I took my shoe off and gave it to him.
Then, in the fashion of the story, he put my shoe back on my foot right there, to 'prove' that I'm the one for him. That was totally pointless, because he never left me. So I took the shoe off, gave it back to him, and told him to come back tomorrow when my step-mother had me locked in a closet or something.
I couldn't let it be that easy for him. He had to save me from something.

The most romantic part of the dream was when we were dancing and walking in the moonlight. I was thinking "He's even taller than me! How romantic!"

You Know What I Mean?

I looked at this online chat board about an emotionally charged subject. Since it was such a hot topic, it generated over 300 reader comments with-in a day. I thought it was interesting that people bother to comment after that many other comments, when there is little chance of getting any feedback from another reader, unless of course, they insult another reader.

I think many people just comment for the sake of expressing themselves. They don't necessarily need a listener, just as long as they 'get it off their chest'. It's so much more satisfying though, to have a listener who actually takes time to comprehend what you're saying.

I think I'm pretty in tune to whether someone is interested in what I'm saying or not. Whenever I sense someone is not into what I'm saying, I just stop talking. Sometimes mid-sentence. Every once in a while when I do this, a person will notice that I've stopped and say something like "what were you saying?".

Some people don't seem to need someone to display active interest while they talk. Sometimes, I purposely show dis-interested body language the whole time they're talking to see if it changes the pace of their story.

The most challenging thing to do is to show active interest in what someone else is saying. However, it's an enjoyable challenge to show how another person's words have affected me. It shows honor to the speaker. Plus, when you show someone's words have made an impact, they're less likely to keep saying the same thing over and over.

Memorial Pics

Us before the memorial. Do I look pregnant yet?

Art Impressions

There's only two 'true' art galleries in my town, besides the many gallery shops that are everywhere here. One is the Delaplaine, on the Carroll Creek Promenade. That place displays various nice-looking pieces as well as an area exhibiting art work of local children. I never see anything spectacular there, but I still enjoy seeing the work locals have produced.

The other place is called the Blue Elephant. This place tends to be on the 'controversial' side. In there, you'll find exhibits that display things like baby dolls with nails hammered into their faces, or pictures of small dogs drowning, or anything resembling the crucifix.

My first visit there was the first time I saw 'controversial' art. I left the place disappointed. I thought it was awful and creepy. It made me wonder what kind of 'sickos' make stuff like this. I imagine it was the intent of the artist to make me feel that way.

A long while later, a friend of mine asked me to go see his exhibit at a special show they were having there. I thought I'd give it another shot. I had forgotten how creepy the exhibits were the first time. It had not changed. There were still displays that linked children to suffering, and a bunch of sacrilegious things. This time, I walked out of the place thinking "Oh yeah, the creepy place." It no longer shocked me. Basically, you just have to take something people feel strongly about (like protecting children, or their religious beliefs) and do something disgusting or horrifying to it. Then, you would have something worthy of that display.

Now, if after two visits to a gallery like that, I'm no longer scandalized, what about 'contro' art buffs? I appreciate art, but am very unfamiliar with the whole industry. Regarding people who live for art: Do they get shocked everytime? Or is it just an appreciation that grows through exposure?

I guess I would understand if I acquired a taste for contro-art myself. I don't think that's going to happen, when there are so many more savory studies to pursue.

More mommy stories

Filip had 'bell jeans' (jelly beans) for the first time. Now he loves them. Whenever he asks for them, he says "Want bell jeans''
That causes me to confirm what he's saying: "Jellybeans?"
"Ok" he says, as if I'm offering them. I think that's a pretty slick move of his.

I also disappointed him today. My midwife was coming over for an appointment. I told him the 'baby lady' is coming. When she arrived, he was looking behind her at her truck. "Where babies?" I had to tell him we're looking at Mommy's baby. I didn't think that he would expect the lady to bring babies. That would be logical though if she's the 'baby lady'.

Exercise

I have to get back into an exercise routine. I really think the reason why Filip's delivery was so easy was because I was going to the gym 3x a week during most of my pregnancy.
I don't belong to a gym anymore, but there is some stuff I can do at home. I try to focus on my 'core' muscles, since I believe that's the best over-all exercise I can get.
Here's my list of exercises on my routine:

20 minute walk

Large Exercise ball:
Crunches, while leaning on top.
Lifting it with my feet to meet my hands.

8 lb medicine ball:
Crunches, while holding the ball in front of me and up.
Obliques, moving the ball from one side of me to the other while lying down

Weighted Bar:
Place on shoulders, bend over and straighten up
Hold it from side to side

Free Weights:
Bicep crunches

Perfect Pushup:
'Girly' pushups against the wall

Filip:
Upside-down squats. Lay on back, put him on my feet and lift up and down
Calf bounces. Lay him on chins and lift up and down

Myself:
Cycles
Various stretches

Zoo pics

These are in the 'Asian Trail' section of the Zoo. Pandas are so cute!

Washington DC

We took Filip to the Zoo and Natural History museum today. It poured rain this morning, so we had the idea to do the museum first. So did the rest of Washington DC. The place was packed.

We just did the dinosaur and primitive life section. The exhibits are pretty impressive, but the educational value is disappointing. All the speculations there assume that evolution is a proven fact, and not still a theory. The one variable this theory takes notable advantage of is the passage of time. Everything takes millions and millions of years to evolve into something else. It's possible that the earth is that old. However, I question how scientists date when which animals showed up on the scene. Is it all the study of fossils? Or are these dates influenced by the belief that it takes millions of years for an animal to change into another animal? The museum portrays everything there as a fact, so there is no way to know there.

So, on one hand, there was a mix of dinosaur skeletons and models, which were neat to see. But then they also had all these murals of made-up animals that just look like a bunch of hybrids, to show the supposed 'link between the species'.

The zoo was fun. We got to see a red panda, a giant panda, elephants, these little cute monkeys, a cheetah, leopards, hippos, and a bunch of things I never heard of.

We didn't pack a stroller, so Filip had to walk alot. He was so worn out, he kept saying "Sit, chair, sit chair" every time we passed a bench. So JR had to carry him for most of the walk out of the zoo to the metro. Poor little guy, he slept all the way back to Mom mom's.

Immortal Look

JR

Today, someone posted on their site an old picture of a friend who died about 15 years ago. Craig has been pretty much immortalized in the Frederick area. He was a great guy, lots of fun, and ever-stylish. He had tons of friends all over, back in the day. That's how I always remember him.

When I saw a pic of him today, I thought ''Whoa, he had a flat top. That's so 90's". I realized that in my head, I keep updating my memory of him to be in style today. In reality though, Craig died with a flat-top.

I know I digress, but I actually like flat-tops on black guys. The above pic is a flat-topped JR when he was in his 20's. I think it would be so cool if JR could grow one again. If everything else about his look was up-to-date, I think a FT would make such a cool statement. Like, "I have a flat top, because I know it looks good, not because I'm stuck in the 90's".

Dreaming

Another cute Filip story. Every morning when he wakes up, I ask him what he dreamed about. He used to say the same thing, every day, "Horsey, was mean..."

Now he's trying to say some other things when I ask him. This morning, he said "boney cows".

I have been playing the same Bible story CD for him over and over. The first story, is called 'Pharoah's Dreams'. So, he keeps hearing that Pharoah dreamed about 7 fat cows, and 7 boney cows. So now, that's what Filip dreams about.

He's so smart! I'm going to have to kiss his brain.

Scary Movie

I rented Land Before Time 12 for Filip at the library. Since it's dinosaurs, of course he loved it. Then it got better, because Cera's (the triceratops) little sister was born. So his favorite portions of the movie were the scenes with the 'baby'.

At the climax of the movie, the baby dinosaur falls into the rushing river and can't swim. As required in scenes like this, the baby is headed straight for a waterfall.

Filip was so upset by this. He cried for me, and I had to comfort him while the baby was in trouble. Then, the disc started skipping. Not just a quick skip, we had to wait 5 full minutes for the movie to resume again. All the while, Filip is crying:

"Baby! Arde, Baby! Mommy, Baby Arde! Baby Arde!"

BTW "Arde" is Filip for 'Water'.

Finally, we get to the scene where they save the baby, and all was well again. However, through the evening, he kept telling me about the baby and the arde. I had to keep reminding him that the baby was saved.

Teaching

I went to the piano store last night. I sat in on one of the group classes that my boss taught. She wants me to be teaching some of these classes. It should be a new challenge for me to teach several children at once. I'm looking forward to it.

The program is pretty straight forward. You just go by the book they provide, and you make sure there are plenty of interactive group activities. Preparation is the key.

I've learned alot just these few times I was watching Teresa teach her class. Before, I didn't think I had control over how seriously my students took their lessons. I figured it was just a toss up on if they we're 'good' students or 'bad' students. The 'good' students would learn more, and the 'bad' students would review the old stuff more. However, after watching her teach, I realize that the teacher has a huge bearing on how seriously the students treat their lessons.

There are also practical things that I can implement right away. These would be like giving students written homework every week, and requiring them to turn it in. I also need to require good rhythm right from the start. I used to let them learn a song, and then work on the rhythm. The most important thing I am going to start is to have a lesson plan prepared in advance, instead of just 'winging' it.

So I'm excited about having a whole class to teach. I can really see how it's going to improve the caliber of my teaching ability in private lessons as well.

Mohonk

We are at our favorite place today. We left at 3:45am today and arrived for breakfast at 8:30. We decided to sneak off. I didn't even tell my Mom.

Hi Mom!! I'm sending you a post card!

For breakfast, I had a veggie omelette, french toast, eggs benedict with tomato, fresh pineapple and blackberries, toasted pecans, sausage and bacon. I shared with Filip, who ate alot! He was a hungry boy.

Filip is staying very occupied. He played with tree blocks and watched a bird in the conservatory room. He checked out a couple of fireplaces. He's also playing with a sparkly ball that I bought him in the gift shop. He's enjoying exploring the mansion.

I'm going to write some postcards today, catch up on some reading, maybe we'll go ice skating. I know JR wants to see the greenhouse.

Oh yeah this is funny. Filip saw the jar of crispy rice cakes and just HAD to have one. He had no idea that they taste like nothing. I guess to a two-year-old it looks like a big cookie. Well, now he knows. He kind of touched it with his tongue, and moved on.

Ham and other vices

Before JR had even finished his cleanse, he brought home this huge ham from Cracker Barrel. It was a really good price, and we could freeze it for later, and my Mom would want some, yada yada yada.
I love ham, but I try not to eat too much. Pork is probably the unhealthiest meat a person could possibly eat (except maybe crabs). My impression is that pigs eat anything, and require tons of vaccinations in order to be suitable food for humans. Perhaps I'm wrong, I haven't read anything about it. I still eat it every once in a while, since I don't really have a solid basis to object to it, and I like it.
So we had ham, pancakes and eggs for breakfast. I cut up the leftover ham for lunch. For dinner, I'm using the ham hauck (spelling) to make a bean soup. We have more ham I have to cook within 5 days. I also froze 3 more packages of it.
JR loves this ham so much. I try not to express my reservations about it. There's no use in taking away the joy he gets from eating food he likes.

I'm also trying to stay away from refined sugars. I get plenty of sweets with our maple syrup, honey, and molassas. So every time I have something refined, (basically every time I visit my Mom's) I try to go 3 days before having something else. Stephanie A. made that suggestion of having sweets just 2 times a week. It sounds like a reasonable limit, so I'm trying to adopt it.

JR tends to bring home the sweets. When he was on his cleanse, he brought me home 2 doughnuts. I think I spaced eating them about 2 days apart. Not bad. He also brought home this pecan/caramel fudge. I have not touched it. I'm not supposed to, until Thursday. Maybe I won't touch it at all, and give it as a gift to someone.

I don't know why he was buying all this greedy stuff, during the time he was not going to eat any of it.

I'm having such a hard time enjoying foods that the majority of the population eat without so much as a thought of what they're putting into their bodies. I could not enjoy my breakfast, because I was thinking about the refined flour in the pancakes, the vaccinations in the meat, how I used Mrs. Butterworths instead of real syrup.

The fact is, I have improved my eating habits drastically since I got married. I grew up on foods that do little for my health besides give me calories to burn. Anything good I do now is an improvement from before. I do alot of good things now. I eat sprouts that I grow myself, I make sprouted wheat bread, I drink apple cider vinegar every day, and many more positive things. So if I eat 'normal' food, I really need to just enjoy it. Stressing over it, is worse for my health than eating something bad.

So I sat down with a cup of coffee to eat with my eggs and pancakes (I skipped my own portion of the ham). JR saw me drinking it and says:

"The caffeine in coffee inhibits your body's ability to absorb minerals, so don't bother taking vitamins this morning".

Day 7 A Hungry Man is an Angry Man

JR completed his last cleanse day yesterday. Now he get's to ease back into eating food.
I noticed some good results in him while he was on the cleanse. I know you won't believe that this is possible, but he seemed more calm and relaxed this week. He no longer got moody when he was hungry. His patience level was higher too.
He started working out this week as well. Within a day or so, there was noticeable muscle definition. He looks so manly and strong! He just takes my breath away, but I digress.
His eyes look younger, and well rested.
As an added bonus, I could actually squeeze the blackheads out that were on his back! They used to be there as permanent fixtures, just teasing me to try to squeeze them out. When I tried before, they would bury themselves deeper in as I squeezed, mocking my vigilence at removing all foreign particles from his skin. Now, they're gone. What an accomplishment!

I think his plan is to be on juice today and tomorrow. Tuesday, he'll introduce vegetable broth, and Wednesday he'll begin eating normally.

Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa

The cheap seats have a 'two for one' deal every tuesday night. So, we decided to take Filip to this movie.

I liked this movie much better than the first one. The plot is weak, but the charactors were an improvement from the last one. Basically, it's a bunch of dumb story developments to deliver hilarious pop-cult gags.

If you take the plot seriously, you'll be like "this is just a poor man's lion king" or "didn't I see this 10 times before?". So just view it like you're being entertained by the likes of Bernie Mac, Ben Stiller, Jada Pinkett Smith, Cedric the Entertainer, Alec Baldwin, and that guy from 'Friends', in animal suits. It will make you laugh.